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Warmth
Today my chest is very warm.
Want to feel it by hand?
Don't think otherwise.
When your hand touches it
What a relief I have!
First I came to know your touch only.
Only later
Did I come to know your odour.
It intoxicated me greatly then.
I had inhaled all of it.
It was after this
That I tasted the sweetness of grapes.
How I wished you were just a tongue.
How I wished you were just two ears.
After all the five senses are sated
What still remains is love, isn't it?
Why there should be teeth if not
For biting off the black mark on the lip?
You once asked.
We need all of them, friend.
We will know the need
Only when we do not have it.
Will be glad to get
Whatever is available.
As long as we are alive we should
Not squander away this happiness.
If lost where will we get it from?
*
The Swallows
The swallows warbled wild:
Father and mother are not one, not two,
Teacher and the taught are not one, but one,
Husband and lover are not one, but two
What the husband gives cannot be got from the lover.
What is got from the lover, the husband will not give.
Can't the two be one? The two be one?
The swallows called out loud:
We don't have such distinctions.
What is it, Upanishads, birds?
I asked.
How do you know the truth?
The birds again sang and danced and said:
There is someone who knows the truth.
Who is he? Tell me, birds,
You tiny swallows.
The one who knows the truth is your friend.
Go and ask him.
Chirping and chirping the tiny birds flew away.
To know the truth I called my friend
And asked: Is what the birds sang true?
You may tell me in the ear. Others need not hear.
How do I know what you do not know?
The friend's counter-question.
What could be its answer?
*
Swimming
You told me once about going
Swimming in the Atlantic ocean.
You said it was so cold, you got back to the land
Before your legs developed cramps.
You also mentioned organizing a yoga programme
And doing exercises with a Jewish friend,
And about your failed attempt to eat
Fish pickles at his house.
But aren't there things you have not mentioned?
You did not mention the foam rose
And fell with the waves of the Atlantic,
Or the oily drowsiness of the limb-numbing cold of the sea.
Nor did you mention the umbrella you gave free
To your Jewish friend on parting,
Or how you remembered Talmud, Kabala and Torah
In the smell of his fish pickles.
I know there may be many more things
You have not said. I will say what you haven't.
The way once you slipped and nearly fell
On the hard icy ground,
Feigned sleep at another
When you thought your heart had stopped
Or felt giddy while reading in the library,
You never mentioned details of your illness to me
Though I always told you about my illnesses and well being.
Do you know why? You know it even when you say you don't.
To chatter incessantly is itself proof of life.
For mutual friendship what other evidence do we need?
*
Nature
In those times when I asked you
If you would write about me
You never did.
I felt deeply hurt then.
But is it not usual for man to ignore
The hurt feelings of woman?
Now you write about me only
Every night.
When I think of the many
Golden threads that link you and me,
My old complaints turn sweet and tender.
In how many notes of music you link
Our memories!
And what powerful music you conjure
From your bansuri!
The dreamland you decked long ago
For the daughter of the snow
Is now shared by you and me.
Even in your teens you wove
Dreams about Rajput beauties,
And even before you saw her
You sang songs for her.
You saw nature in different costumes.
Do you know what I got
From the meditation all these years?
You gave my self to me.
I was an orphan girl,
No one had claims on me,
Was even called a bad omen
By the members of the household.
You showed me the me in myself
Friend, you are my mirror, my image
I see you as myself
Someone asks if woman herself is not man.
*
The Broken Dream
Let me tell you the story of a broken dream.
We were in two rooms.
I woke up in the middle of sleep.
When I looked into your room
It was empty.
The easy chair, table, cot and all else
Were not to be seen.
Where did you go, friend?
Did you, with eyes welled up with tears, go
Where no eyes could reach?
I was filled with fear.
My belief
Was that you would never cease to be.
You are immortal.
I said I wanted three rooms.
A friendship room,
A quarrel room,
And a room without friendship or quarrel.
Mating is in the friendship room.
Friendships snap in the quarrel room.
Even at noon the mating time is dark.
You said poetry comes from the mating of minds.
So, friend, I feel that
We need one room only.
There will be one room only when two rooms merge.
Life does not mean mating alone.
*
Youth
For one more year
Give me my youth
Who is the master of all life on earth?
Let him bestow on me a new youthfulness.
I am not content yet with the flowers and fruits
That give sweetness to my zest and lust.
If not for one year, for one year more
Give me my sensual youth.
After that it is vanaprastha.
But till then let me have a fresh youthfulness.
It is not yet time to put out the fire in my gut,
So let it be a dam burst of resurgent youth.
Two eyes are eagerly waiting
To feast on the sight of my tender youth,
Two arms are stretched out for long to hold me tight
And stop the throbbing of my cool youth
Two lips fill with the sweet fragrance of
The sensual carousel of heady youth
Who is the master of life on earth ? Let him
Change my term, re-kindle my passions,
Put a spark to the petard of my body, satiate
The hunger of this damp earth, and ,then
If Death comes any day, let him come.
*
Farewell
Agreed that it is not yet time to bid farewell.
Who should bid farewell to whom?
Will friend bid farewell to a friend?
Is it possible? Any time?
Then who bids farewell? Who should?
To people who wronged us, cheated us.
Were ungrateful to us.
Can they be pardoned?
Shouldn’t a mistake happen only once in life?
It is to wrong that we can bid farewell.
When bidding farewell our face should be calm.
The body should not shake.
The face should not contort.
The voice should not falter.
Black hair shouldn’t turn grey.
Grey hair shouldn’t fall.
When bidding farewell one should be in full youth.
What are the words to be said.
Is it ‘Will meet again.’
Or ‘Don’t come here again’.
Farewell for what purpose, did you say?
Have you forgotten those who held discussions on this issue
And then forgot to bid farewell?
Why should there be farewell at all?
No one is leaving anyone.
Who knows whom, and to what extent?
If not leaving, then why any leave taking?
But this is all a ceremony, friend.
Bidding farewell is interesting.
That is a ritual
That brings peace to the mind.
If done in advance there won’t be any complaint
That we forgot to do so at the proper time.
Now, we can bid farewell to each other.
Or to this earth, or to the day’s sun.
After saying all this it will look bad if we do not bid
farewell.
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